I don’t even know what day it is sometimes. I am constantly in motion, constantly thinking about what I’m supposed to do next. I have so many moments I should be living in, but I am always two steps ahead… in my head. Even while watching Harry Potter, I was already thinking of the conversations I might have with friends after the movie about the movie. Did that ruin the movie for me? No, but I think I could have enjoyed it more if I could commit my mind into the moments that were unfolding in the present.
It seems the only things I do “in the moment” these days are pet my kitties and cuddle with my boyfriend. Everything else seems like a means to an end, and I am not happy about it. I feel like I am missing out on my life.
I can’t tell you how many times I say to myself, “I wish it were next June!” I’d be done with school (my credential). I am so far behind in almost everything I need to be doing: editing, online school, lesson planning, keeping up with the apartment, etc. I find myself dreaming of the days where I have nothing to do… no agenda.
Even with my busy schedule, I find time to have fun. I just don’t have as much fun as I would if my mind were not elsewhere. Here are some of the things I have been up to:
Frid, 11/12 – Came home, got drunk and made cookies. Ended up at an art show in the hood with John R & Josef at 1am.
Sat, 11/13 – Photo shoot, then party in the Hollywood Hills
Sun, 11/14 – Edited photos, did homework, played Angry Birds
Mon, 11/15 – Paid off my car
Tues, 11/16 – Edited photos, homework
Wed, 11/17 – Drove to UCLA (Westwood) after work, then home on surface streets
Thurs, 11/18 – Edited photos, homework, Angry Birds
Fri, 11/19 – Harry Potter 7 at the IMAX in Ontario with lots of awesome people
Sat, 11/20 – Slept in, then went to the LA Zoo with Kyle. Giraffes and Lions were hiding due to the rain and cold. Still very enjoyable. Night: Party at the Towers for Greg & John R’s birthday… so much fun! Absinthe & Rock Band 3!
Sun, 11/21 – Slept in at Kyle’s, enjoyed breakfast and a relaxing day together, then met up with a client (booked Officiating gig for June 2011), then spent the evening editing photos.
Now – Sitting with cats, watching Big Trouble, and about to go to bed (maybe play some Angry Birds)
This week’s plan: Thanksgiving at TMC with friends, Thanksgiving dinner at Kyle’s parents’ house on Friday, see my dad on Saturday, edit photos and do homework on Sunday. Have a great week everyone!
PS. If you live in LA, go check out the Americana’s Christmas tree!